Hi! I’m Carolyn Wagner and I am so glad you’re here. I have three young kids, am married to my high school non-sweetheart (it’s a long story that he loves to tell!), and live in a suburb of Chicago. I am a psychotherapist who specializes in maternal mental health. I love reality TV, attempting things from Pinterest that are way beyond my skill level, and eating. I’m terrible at socially acceptable small talk, keeping my voice to an appropriate volume, and childproofing my language.
Most days you can find me in stretchy pants (leggings, yoga pants, and jeggings are the only things allowed on my legs!), attempting to drink 100oz of water, and pretending like the mess in the kids’ basement doesn’t exist.
I am incredibly passionate about supporting moms, particularly moms who struggle with anger. Why? Because I was that mom. The mom who tried so hard not to yell, but couldn’t help it. The mom who started each day promising herself and her kids that she wouldn’t lose her temper, but did before breakfast. The mom who tried so many different ways to control her anger, but nothing seemed to work. The mom who beat herself up each night. The mom who felt like she was in way over her head and feared she wasn’t cut out for motherhood (even though I went through great lengths to have children).
Only once I decided to embrace my anger, invited it to stay awhile and tell me all it had to share, did I begin to understand what was going on. For me, my anger was a symptom of anxiety, loneliness, and overwhelm. Those were the things that needed to be addressed. If I didn’t work on those things, the anger was never going to go anywhere. As those feelings lessened, so did the anger. Now if I’m being totally honest, I still have my angry days. But I now recognize them as a warning that I’ve gotten out of touch with my body and emotions. There’s no shame in that. Anger is now my buddy that alerts me when I’ve gotten off track.
My experience with postpartum anxiety and depression led me to shift my professional speciality and focus more intensely on working with moms. As one of the first therapists in the country to become a certified specialist in perinatal mental health, I am dedicated to helping moms navigate the often rough seas of motherhood. While I absolutely love working individually with clients in therapy, I also recognize that not everyone has access to a perinatal specialist, or the time or resources to be in long-term therapy. My work with The Calm Mama Method is a way to reach even more moms and help even more families find the calm and balance they need to thrive.
**It’s important to note that even though I am a therapist, the material presented in The Calm Mama Method is not therapy, nor is it a substitute for therapy. If you are interested in finding a therapist to help you individually, I highly recommend checking out Postpartum Support International’s directory of specially trained providers.**
# of kids I have
# of times I hit snooze in the morning
# of days from when I met my husband until we married
% of time I change at least one part of my outfit each day
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